angry?! blaming?!

Feel very sad for your attitude
as we know for so long,
asked you about that,
maybe in the way of expressing,
it hurts or offended you,
maybe in the way of expressing make you feel that
I am not understanding, selfish,
I just feel that you are getting even further...

You explained,
don't know what kind of feeling I had that time,
felt that you are just giving excuses,
very lame excuses,
I was wishing I can accept that,
I understand what you explained,
but I was not satisfied,
a bit angry and at the same time,
sad too...
why you replied this and why I thought like that...

no title

This few days, my body not so feeling well, no mood for doing anything. Luckily, quite fine now.

This few days, although I have something to share with, I am free enough, but just don't know why I can't blog it out. Can't write anything for starting too. I think is because of my English level don't allow me to produce it, if not it will be a terrible piece of blog.

My mind is bothering quite a lot of stuffs recently. Some stuffs because made me sick of waiting, so I throw tantrum at home and just luckily I didn't shout or scold at the person involved.

Damn boring these few days, didn't do anything much, not because I am lazy, is just that my health problem didn't allow me to do so. ( Ke Jun, enough of excuses... )


Today felt a bit suffocated ( because of being in the sulks? can't find a channel to express my depression? or weather factor? )

I am too weak to produce a good piece now. My mind still being distracted. When my mood back to normal, I will write a better piece, can describe more and maybe more lively.

"random" thoughts

Am I still in hesitation?
too much time now,
making me think of,
am I really like...
chemistry or biochemistry?

Because I like chemistry too much?
Or is just I haven't start to love biology yet?
I love chemistry, I admit this.
But shouldn't I put the same interest and effort on biology?

My friend always praised me of my chemistry ( not now ), making me wonder, am I really like chemistry or biochemistry? Have I wasted my talent in chemistry by choosing biochemistry?

Sometimes I hope I can take chemistry and biochemistry at the same time. I hope I still have the time after finish my degree in biochemistry to pursue my dream in chemistry.

回顾

刚才看回以前写的日记 ( 今年的 ),
年头的大部分都是写教学的烦恼,
年中写的是趣事及令人欣慰的感觉,
以及一些与同事们相处的开心气氛.

说真的,
我都从未真正了解开心的感觉,
从我认识同事们开始,
一直到相处的时候,
才开始了解,
与她们( 同事兼朋友 )相处,
我渐渐了解什么叫做开心, 兴奋.
我喜欢与她们在一起.

学生的爱戴及尊敬,
是让我有股苦尽甘来的感觉.
有点想念小朋友们,
想念他们与我的互动.

wondering

有时候觉得，
我是很开心回到我曾任教的学校去看看，
我是很开心能遇见我的同事兼朋友，
但是...

但，
我总觉得好像不是很受欢迎，
有点阻着地球转, 妨碍他们,
在想，
是同事们都很忙?
还是实际上与其他的同事都不熟悉?
所以常去找的都是与自己相处的融洽的同事.
但却很受学生的欢迎.
学生看见我就会向我敬礼,
或来找我说话. ( 最感到欣慰的事 )

上次, 代替我的临教主动来与我说话，
( 我一直都没机会找她说话因为我教的课都是编排在后面的 )
哈哈,
她也一样, 教到一些学生教到要“吐血”了.
那些学生还是这么难搞吗?

Awesome performance

Yesterday ( 26/9 ), again a day with the same routine. ( I am not crapping here ), the thing is gonna to be posted, "listen" to me first.

At night, I called my teacher, my science teacher who taught me in F2 whether free to go for tea. ( She looked like more a friend than a teacher. ) Hehe... She asked me whether wanna watch a concert ( from dvd ). I immediately agreed. Prepare myself to go to her house. ( wait la, about to start it seriously ).

I watched the first piece ( song ), "Voices of Spring", nice ( but not my liking ). By the way, let me introduce the orchestra and the conductor ( or composer too? ) first. The conductor, Andre Rieu, with his orchestra, Strauss orchestra ( if I am not mistaken ). They play mainly the Waltz.

I like the performance. In addition with the sound effect, is just like watching the concert in live. Wow... The players do not being restricted in their clothes, well. overall, there is a common part, they wear gown ( not the same kind, same colour ) which make them looked gorgeous.

The special part about this conductor is he is quite humorous. His concert is not really formal, a bit informal, he arranges some humorous part to make people laugh, gives people a feeling of relaxation, not making the phenomenon so serious until not much smile. He always smile. Forgot to state that, he doesn't hold the baton, instead he plays the violin with his orchestra, and I really impressed with their accuracy in the beats. They do not run off the beat at all. Of course, there is an overall coordination among the conductor and his orchestra. His playing also good. And some of the members of the orchestra can even play more than two instruments. Some additional players like the marching band members, etc, ( which I also don't know what is the name of the instrument played ) also inserted in the encore songs. The players are awesome. Impressed...

What I can say is, different conductors has their own style of conducting their orchestra. We can't say much on their style, We accept and try to enjoy it. Anyway, I like the style. Make people feel relax.

I watched the second time today. Won't be boring for watching so many times.
Sorry here for my lack of nice or better words for description. I wish I can describe better. I also know that picture can bring more words.

Make it fixed

I have two blogs, One at MSN Live Spaces, another one is here. Well, in the beginning, these two blogs serve to publish different kinds of pieces from me. But as time goes, starts to mix up the types of pieces uploaded here. Because? Sometimes, certain piece wanna be uploaded at live spaces, but the service always lag that time. So, avoid of losing the piece ( can't save also that time, because every service is unavailable ), I paste it at blogspot. Totally mess up sometimes.

Well, get it reorganized. Live spaces is for more general idea, general feeling, crapping, nothing to hide, can be published to public, since many contacts there. Can link easily, pieces written cannot be too harsh or else. Need more gentle. Haha...swt. ( Generally )
Blogspot is more for close friends. ( former classmate, and others who I think can read it ) Pieces here are from my own sentimental feeling, opinion ( more crazy mind ), can "shoot" people, without others knowing who I am mentioning about ( haha=.=), etc...things that I don't want so many people know.( more to private but not confidential ). People who is "kaki blog" would have my blogspot address, those are not, won't have, I think.

I like to read other people's blogs too. Can keep myself update how is their life going on there. Sometimes can share some idea or opinion too.